Happy (Belated) Mothers Day!

As a mother, I’ve developed a new appreciation for teachers who allow students to join class late; babies sometimes have very different timelines than their parents. True to form, I’m acknowledging Mothers Day a little late, but I think most mothers are happy to accept a little appreciation any day of the year. Here’s an excerpt from a call to end mommy wars I recently wrote for Inner Fire:

Let us celebrate motherhood this year by putting inane mommy wars to rest. Too often we shame, blame, and criticize other mothers in the name of championing what is best for their children, all while disregarding that tearing down another woman is never in the best interest of her family.

Instead of getting distracted by petty arguments, let us begin a dialog about how we can elevate one another: How can we stand for each other? How can we empower our daughters? How can we change the world for them so that if they become mothers, they have the support, education, and resources to make the best choices for themselves and for their families?

Happy mothers day, mamas! Please read the rest of the article over at Inner Fire>>

Personal Spring Cleaning

I’ve been particularly motivated to do some spring cleaning this year because my toddler finds new, undesirable ways to interact with clutter on a daily basis. The less I have the less I have to childproof. With how hectic motherhood is it’s hard to find the time! Similarly, it’s hard to find the time for self-care, meditation, and introspection; i.e., personal spring cleaning. I recently wrote an article for Inner Fire about how important it is to take out the trash. Here’s an excerpt:

Intuitively, we know what in our lives is just trash that’s taking up space: It’s the stuff we hold onto just in case we come up with a use for it later in life; it’s the mementos we never look at; it’s the ingrained habits that no longer serve us. It’s just trash, nothing more. Today, I challenge you to let go of one of the old pieces of trash taking up space in your life, abruptly and without ceremony. Take it to the curb and do not look back.

Read the full article over at Inner Fire>>

February Resolutions

This year I’m setting February resolutions because (A) I’ve been running late since I became a parent, and (B) gyms are ridiculously overcrowded in January.

Having a baby thrust me into survival mode for several months and everything except keeping my family clean, clothed, and fed got pushed to the back burner (which has been broken since we bought our house; getting it repaired is yet another deferred task). 2015 was the year of the baby. 2016 is the year of reestablishing the healthy, conscious, ambitious habits that I strayed from for the baby’s sake. I do not regret the choices I made in 2015—I gave the fleeting phase of new motherhood my everything, which was beautiful, joyful, challenging, purposeful, and all-consuming. 2016 is not about neglecting baby care, it’s about embracing my little one’s growing independence and taking ownership of the space it offers me to do and be more.

Here the habits I am forming over the next year:

  1. Eat as well as the baby eats. It is too regular an occurrence that I am feeding the baby freshly prepared organic yam, kale, chicken, and olive oil with one hand and myself Dijiorno pizza with the other. Now, going head-to-head with the baby, matching her  for fruits, veggies, high-protein foods, and healthy fats. I’m on the hunt for meals we can both eat. Yesterday I made mini veggie patties her her and grown-up sized ones for my husband and myself, and it felt great to have a family meal we could all enjoy. I’m on the hunt for family recipes; please post any leads in the comments! In an infant nutrition class I took, the teacher reported that the most significant predictor of how kids end up eating is not what their parents feed them, what what parents eat themselves, so in the long run my eating habits are healthy for the baby too!
  2. Exercise every single day. I dropped down to my pre-pregnancy weight quickly, so the effects of pregnancy and childbirth on my body aren’t outwardly apparent. However, they persist. Last year, I blogged about my challenge with hypermobile joints during pregnancy. The effects have been lasting and uncomfortable (especially since breastfeeding continues to produce hormones that keep my joints lax). Daily exercise is no longer Monday: Step class, Tuesday: Vinyasa yoga, Wednesday: six mile run (and so on…) as it was five years ago. For now, doing fifteen minutes of simple physical therapy exercises before bed counts. To give me the time, space, and community to develop this goal, the baby and I have joined a gym with childcare. The other day, a friend who joined the same gym texted me: “I’m excited to get this baby weight off” and, embarrassingly, I initially interpreted her statement to mean drop the baby off at the daycare. Fitness has long been a haven for me, so along getting stronger and more stable, I’m excited for some real me time (getting out the house to do errands like getting my hair cut and legs waxed doesn’t seem like it should count).
  3. Reduce, reuse, recycle. Before the baby was born, I set an intention to harness my powerful love for her and extend it to all beings. This is hard to do during the tumultuous newborn stage. The baby took up all my love and energy, and I quickly became dependent on the convenience of overly-packaged takeout meals and Amazon Prime deliveries—environment be damned. I got lazy about recycling anything that needed to be washed and frequently disposed of green waste via the garbage disposal rather than dealing with the overflowing food scraps bin. Other than getting over my apathy, my first action item is to get recycling and green waste bins in every room of the house so that there is no excuse to throw junk mail or a used tissue into the trash. My second step is to reduce use of waste-producing items (paper towels are a big opportunity). Once these changes are in place, I’m committed to continuing to look for ways we can increase our contribution to a healthy environment.
  4. Take ownership of home ownership. When we bought our house, I saw so much potential in it! I was going to plant a vegetable garden, convert the patio into a zen oasis, re-landscape the front lawn into a drought-resistent bee-friendly labyrinth, plan and budget for a kitchen remodel down the line, and set up a garage organization system so that it wouldn’t get stacked to the rafters with empty Amazon packaging (as it is now). Two weeks after we closed on the house, we found out I was pregnant, and between the nausea and difficulty moving most of that went out the window. A year-and-a-half later I’m a long way from achieving that vision, and I keep using the baby as a less and less convincing excuse. It’s time to make an action items list and start checking things off.
  5. Dress like a grown-up. When I recently came across the hilarious image below, and it made me think twice about setting this goal, but I’m sticking with it. The timeframe in which it’s still acceptable to wear maternity jeans and yoga pants all the time expired months ago. The last two years have been transformational: I bought a house, I moved to the suburbs, I went through pregnancy, I became a mother, I got older, I stopped teaching yoga… My lifestyle has drastically changed and many of my old clothes are no longer comfortable, practical, or expressive of who I am now. I hate shopping, so I signed up for Stitch Fix, and am hoping to slowly piece together a more suitable wardrobe, month-by-month.
Top 20 Things No Woman Should Wear After 30

I guess it’s time to retire my shirt made of wasps…

What are your New Years Resolutions, and how are they going? Please share in the comments below!

The Perfectionist’s Guide To Moderation

The only quote I have listed on my Facebook profile is, “Ce qui mérite d’être fait mérite d’être bien fait,” which translates to, “That which is worth doing is worth doing well.” Obviously, the spirit behind this quote is to inspire me to strive for excellence, which is an good thing; however, this philosophy has also lead me into the traps set by perfectionism:

  1. Inaction: “If I can’t do it well, I won’t do it at all.”
  2. Taking on too much: “No one else can live up to my standards, so I’ll do it all myself.”
  3. Inadequacy: “What I did wasn’t perfect, so it wasn’t good enough.”
  4. Criticism: “What you did wasn’t perfect, so it wasn’t good enough.”

If this sounds familiar, I recently wrote an article over at Inner Fire about overcoming perfectionism: The Perfectionist’s Guide To Moderation. (No comment on how long it took me to decide whether the apostrophe fit better before or after the s.)

For more on perfectionism, here’s a post I wrote three years ago around the quote “Sometimes we strive so hard for perfection that we forget that imperfection is happiness.”

Sometimes we strive so hard for perfection that we forget that imperfection is happiness. - Karen Nave

Sometimes we strive so hard for perfection that we forget that imperfection is happiness. – Karen Nave

Winter Wisdom

It’s been a busy winter between joyful visits with friends and family, near-and-far, and weathering my first cold and flu season with an infant (I don’t think I’ve ever been sick this frequently in my life). It’s given me lots to write about over at Inner Fire!

Each member of my extended family has different desires and expectations around gifts, which inspired a festive article: How To Give Presence During The Holidays. When my husband asked me years ago what the most important, defining part of Christmas was, my knee jerk response was, “The cheese ball my mom makes” (Whoops, I meant, spending time with family and friends. He still hasn’t let me live this down). Needless to say, this is my favorite alternative to gift-giving during the holidays:

Hungry belly. Humans bond over food, and this is truer than ever over the holidays. If your diet differs from your loved ones’, consider ways to participate in meals without compromising on your needs. Maybe make a hearty quinoa and beet salad to share, and pair it with parts of the group meal that are within your diet. Maybe throw your ideals out the window for a day and dig in. Make a choice that works for your situation.

Whether I’m visiting frosty Canada or in chilly Northern California, there’s one constant: I’m always cold. For other yogis who cannot bundle up enough in the winter, I wrote 10 Fiery Yogic Practices To Get You Through The Winter Months. My method of choice it to warm up from the inside by combining two of the ideas I listed: spice and hot tea:

Try antioxidant-packed turmeric tea.

Having a baby last year threw me into survival mode for a bit, and I’m just getting back to setting goals that extend beyond keeping my family clean, clothed, and fed. Here’s an article about how to power up your 2016 goals: The Secret To Making Your New Years Resolutions Stick. I’ll give it away; the secret is defining your sankalpa:

Well-formulated New Years resolutions are specific, measurable, realistic goals broken down into steps with deadlines. Your sankalpa is the fire that ignites these goals.

This year, I didn’t get around to setting my New Years resolutions until February, but I’m okay with that. Instead of getting started exhausted from the holidays and getting over a cold, I’m beginning rested, healthy, and focused. Join me! It’s better to be a month late than to wait twelve months until 2017.