Category Archives: Mindful Pregnancy

13 Weeks Pregnant: Ascending From the Haze of the First Trimester

Posted on by

September 14 – September 21: 13 Weeks 0 Days – 13 Weeks 6 Days.

Just when I was saying I forgot what it was like not to be nauseous, I had nearly three days in a row of no nausea! I got a glimpse of what it was like to be one of those women who loves every moment of pregnancy.

Instead of dragging my butt to Preggo Pilates, I skipped out the front door. When I picked Richard up from work, he told me I was glowing and looked happy (Although, later he wondered aloud if that may have been in comparison to how wan and miserable I’d been the previous week). The nausea stayed at bay even when I wasn’t constantly stuffing food into my mouth (before I was pregnant an excuse to eat all the time sounded like a dream come true, but now that I have to eat all time to stave off discomfort I feel like a slave to food). I had the wherewithal to book a prenatal massage, which was lovely. Able to imagine myself doing some manual labor, I explored two landscape and gardening centers so I could begin to make tangible plans for my new yard. Richard and I celebrated our fourth wedding anniversary with an Italian dinner followed by chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream topped with Heath Bar pieces—the first time I’ve been able to eat a whole serving of ice cream to myself since I found out I was pregnant (I’ve had an aversion to sugar). For a good friend’s birthday, I got dressed up with make-up and everything, stood on a rooftop patio overlooking the San Francisco skyline and sipped an icy virgin pina colada, and didn’t get to bed until after midnight that night.

The next morning I woke up feeling awful. Maybe it was my body’s way of telling me, “If you’re feeling better, don’t push your luck. Keep eating. Keep pacing yourself. Keep getting enough sleep.”

It’s discouraging to feel nauseous and unmotivated to get anything done again, but those three days gave me a glimmer of hope that feeling better during pregnancy is a possibility.

Update: Now at 29 weeks pregnant, I haven’t been nauseous in ages. I can’t even remember what it’s like (maybe I repressed the memories). There have been some new discomforts and annoyances during my second trimester, but their invasiveness in my life pales in comparison to the nausea. If you’re having a queasy first trimester have faith that for most people it gets better and pregnancy overall gets easier!

28 Weeks Pregnant: 13 Misconceptions I Had About Babies

Posted on by

December 29 – January 4: 28 Weeks 0 Days – 28 Weeks 6 Days.

Update: This post generated a great discussion on Facebook. I concede that this post should actually be named “13 Misconceptions I Had About The Research About Babies.” Real babies can be quite different from theoretical babies. More updates below on individual points.

People say all the time that you can never be ready for pregnancy, childbirth, or parenthood, but reading up on and preparing for these stages at least makes me feel ready. I’m two-thirds done pregnancy, I’ve read several books about it, I’m going to regular prenatal visits at my hospital, I’m enrolled in a birth prep class, my birth and postpartum doulas are hired… I feel that doing much more would be over-preparing for birth. As such, I’ve chosen to move on to reading about newborn care. After poring over online reviews, I chose two baby books to read:

  • Baby 411 by Ari Brown and Denise Fields. This book struck me as one that would contain conventional, mainstream advice on newborn care.
  • The Baby Book by the Doctors Sears. This book struck me as a little more hippy-dippy-touchy-feely (i.e. totally up my alley), as it encourages attachment parenting.

Baby 411These books are both tomes, so Richard and I chose to each tackle one. I decided that since my intuitions would probably gravitate more toward the Baby Book and his toward Baby 411, we should swap to read the book that would give us different perspective. I just finished reading Baby 411, and the chapters on newborn care were informative, non-judgmental, and easy to read. I didn’t enjoy the (many) chapters about everything that can go wrong with the baby, but the conditions were presented in a non-alarming way and I’ll be glad to have all that information for reference when I’m wondering if my baby’s latest rash is anything to worry about. The vaccinations chapter aside (which was strongly pro-vax—I happen to agree so it didn’t bother me), Baby 411 focused on giving the reader straight-up information, rather telling the reader what to do, so parents could draw their own conclusions.

My biggest take-away from reading Baby 411 was that many of the opinions I held about newborn care were kind of ignorant, based mainly on things I’d heard, not on actual science or evidence. I don’t like to think of myself as judgmental—previously, if I saw a baby using a pacifier, I wouldn’t think anything as blatant as, Omg, I can’t bu-lieve those parents are using a pacifier. That is SO bad for the baby. But I might think something more subtly judgmental like, Ah, this must be a fussy baby and the parents need to use a pacifier for their own sanity. I didn’t occur to me that maybe these parents were more educated than me and made a carefully informed choice to use a pacifier to best support their baby’s health (see below for more on pacifiers). Baby 411 certainly put me in my place.

Here are Thirteen Misconceptions I Had About Babies, and what Baby 411 had to say about them. Some of these statements are not categorically false—just much more nuanced than I realized:

Misconception #1: You can train newborns to sleep when you want them to. I didn’t necessarily think this was a good idea (see next my point), but I did think it was possible. According to Baby 411 it’s not: newborns are not developmentally capable of falling asleep on their own. Intense sleep training before five or six months will be futile and detrimental to the baby. In fact, the authors also say that “you can’t spoil a newborn” because bad sleep habits don’t develop until after two months of age. As such, all the “rules” for promoting independent sleep go out window for newborns (e.g. don’t breastfeed the baby to sleep). Parents can unabashedly do whatever it takes (within reason, of course) to get a newborn to sleep.

Misconception #2: Letting a baby “cry it out” will mess her up.

Update: A better statement of my misconception would be “Research strongly suggests that letting a baby ‘cry it out’ will definitely, for sure, mess her up.” This was my misconception, but it doesn’t mean the exact opposite is true (i.e. Letting a baby “cry it out” is definitely, for sure, not going to mess up any child). Reality is something more like, “Research is equivocal about the safety of the ‘cry it out; method.”

I’ve heard and read this so many times that I assumed there was hard evidence backing this statement, but it actually stands on shaky ground, scientifically. Proviso: As mentioned above, the baby must be neurologically mature enough to settle on her own (five to six months), and shouldn’t be left to cry it out when she needs a diaper change, is hungry, or there’s an underlying medical reason for her crying. The two main ways to teach a baby to sleep on her own are Rapid extinction/Cry it out (which I’d be too much of a worrywart to handle) and Progressive Waiting/Ferberizing (which I would be more comfortable with). Interestingly, many infant sleep disorders are attributed to excessive parental intervention (e.g. Soothing a baby to sleep then putting her to bed—when she wakes up briefly as part of her natural sleep cycle she’s shocked and upset that the parent has disappeared, and cries to get them back). All of this said, I wouldn’t go so far as to say that the research proves that sleep training is definitely safe either. The authors of Baby 411 did not advocate for independent sleep over co-sleeping (other than to warn of the increase SIDS risk in a shared bed). My pre-parenthood opinion is that at the current state of research, the question of sleep training comes down to individual parents’ instincts, opinions, and individual needs; neither camp has grounds to be on a high horse.

Misconception #3: Breast milk is nutritionally complete.

Update: This isn’t anti-breastfeeding; Baby 411 strongly encourages breastfeeding. Also, this misconception is a bit of an overstatement. Breast milk is nutritionally complete for infants until their iron stores become depleted, at which point parents either add iron-rich solid food (e.g. cereal) or iron supplements. Friends have pointed me to additional resources that say exclusive breastfeeding is fine until six or nine months, so supplementation at four months (as reported below) may be overly-cautious. Please consult with your pediatrician or lactation consultant!

The opinion that breast milk is amazing, perfect, and has magical powers is mainstream and well-supported. When I’d heard the recommendation that babies should be breastfed for a year (or more), I thought that meant exclusive breastfeeding. It turns out this would be unhealthy. When babies are born, they have a plentiful store of iron from their mothers, but by six to nine months these iron stores are completely depleted. Baby 411 recommends that babies who are exclusively breastfed take an iron supplement from four months until they have other dietary sources of iron. The authors say solid foods, such as meat or cereals naturally high in iron, should be introduced into a baby’s diet between four six months (there are risks associated with introducing solid foods earlier or later than that; check out the book for more details).

Misconception #4: Breastfed babies will grow better than their formula-fed counterparts.

Update: As in the previous point, this is not anti-breastfeeding; Baby 411 strongly recommends breastfeeding. This misconception should have been stated “Breastfed babies will grow faster than their formula-fed counterparts” from the get-go. As explained below, faster growth doesn’t necessarily mean better growth.

If “better” means “faster” this is false. Breastfed babies grow slower than formula fed babies for the first four to six months. Baby 411 accents that this slower growth does not mean breastfed babies are less healthy; breastfeeding has been proven to be beneficial for babies’ health and development. However, growth charts produced by the CDC, which some doctors may use, compare a baby’s growth to other children in America—both those who are breastfed and formula-fed—making breastfed children look like they’re growth is lagging. Growth charts produced by the WHO (which the CDC itself recommends for infants) draw on data from several countries and consider breastfed babies’ growth patterns to be the gold standard. The authors recommend asking a baby’s doctor which chart they use to evaluate growth.

Misconception #5: Newborn babies should never be placed on their bellies. To avoid confusion: Putting babies to sleep on their backs is important. There is rock solid evidence that this helps prevent sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). However, always being on her back can cause the back of a baby’s head to flatten. Also, Baby 411 cited an interesting statistic: back-sleeping infants who end up sleeping on their tummies are 18 times more likely to die from SIDS, eek. This is thought to be due to a dearth of experience coping with being on the belly and a lack of neck muscles development (Side conclusion: if a baby is a back sleeper, make sure all babysitters and other caretakers know to only put the baby to sleep on her back). To help develop experience and neck muscles strength, the recommendation is to have babies spend at least five awake, supervised minutes on their tummies per day for the first eight weeks of life.This is cutely called “Tummy Time.”

Misconception #6: Pacifiers are evil. I’d heard that pacifiers interfere with breastfeeding, mess up teeth, and cause ear infections. Baby 411 added one more: they may disrupt sleep because when the baby’s pacifier falls out during the night she will “call” mom to replace it. However, pacifiers have one significant plus: They have been shown to drastically reduce the risk SIDS. According to this well-written summary of research about pacifiers, pacifiers can reduce SIDS risk by fifteen to fifty percent, depending on use. What about those risks? There’s not much indisputable scientific evidence that pacifiers interfere with breastfeeding, just a lot of anecdotal evidence (which is still worth taking into account). To be safe, Baby 411 recommends waiting until breastfeeding is well-established before introducing a pacifier (usually around two to four weeks). For the other factors, the magic number is six months. SIDS risk is greatest before six months, so this is when pacifiers are most beneficial. Ear infection risk is pretty low until six months. Tooth decay isn’t an issue until the baby actually has teeth, which also often occurs around six months (even then, tooth decay can be circumvented by sterilizing pacifiers before use and not dipping them in honey or sugar). According to the article linked above, pacifier use doesn’t contribute to tooth misalignment until eighteen months. If parents choose to use a pacifier, Baby 411 recommends doing so between two to four weeks and six months of age, and using the Soothie brand (which I got for my baby shower!), because it is designed to closely resemble a human nipple.

28 Weeks Pregnant

28-week bump update from the beach. Compare this to the beach photo in my previous post about week 12 to see how much I’ve grown. (Or look back two posts to see that I’ve maybe shrunk a little since Christmas without all the yummy treats around)

Misconception #7: Babies should be warm and cozy when they sleep. When we bought our new home, we knew it needed to have its ducts insulated, and I made sure we got it done quickly because I worried the baby would get cold in the nursery. Turns out the ideal sleeping temperature for babies is much cooler that I thought: according to Baby 411, the recommended safe room temperature to reduce SIDS risk is only 68 degrees. Interestingly, anything that can cause the ambient temperature of the crib to go up—like the adorable bumper pads that perfectly match my “Forest Friends” nursery theme—increases the risk of SIDS. The authors recommend hanging anything but the bare bones crib bedding on the wall as decoration. After reading this, I also opted to buy a crib that had slats on all sides to promote better ventilation rather one that had one or two stylishly solid sides.

Misconception #8: A fever of 101°F degrees is panic-worthy. The Fever-phobia section of Baby 411 was written for me, because I’ve been wracked with worry every time Richard has had a fever (once, I was up all night Googling “rabies” to rule it out for sure). I thought that 99°F was a fever and 101°F was a worrisome fever. It turns out that body temperature fluctuates quite a bit throughout the day. According to Baby 411, it’s coolest at 7am (as low as 97.6°F) and highest at 7pm (as high at 100°F). The true definition of a fever is a body temperature of 100.4 or higher taken rectally. So, 101°F is a low fever. The authors insisted on using a rectal thermometer, which I begrudgingly added to my baby registry—we’ll see if I actually muster up the nerve to use it (I also added an ear thermometer as a back up).

Misconception #9: Fever-reducing medicine prevents the baby’s brain from getting cooked. Baby 411 says that a fever cause by infection is unlikely to cause brain damage. Body temperatures over 108°F cause brain damage, but attaining that level of heat takes environmental factors (like leaving the baby in a hot car) to push body temperature this high. According to the authors, infections do not cause body temperatures over 106°F. Fever-reducing medicine is just to help the baby feel more comfortable. Thank goodness for one less thing to worry about with regard to both the baby and the husband.

Misconception #10: I’m vaccinating my baby, so she will be safe whether or not other parents vaccinate theirs. Vaccines have a couple legitimate risks (which Baby 411 goes over in great detail), but the rate of death and disability is much higher if a child actually gets one of the diseases we routinely vaccinate against. Some children are medically unable to get vaccinated (e.g. they’re allergic to a component of the vaccine), so I’ve also always felt a sense of social responsibility to get my children vaccinated to protect those that can’t be. However, even though I’m pro-vax, I’ve never felt the need to have advocate to others about it. I didn’t think others’ decisions would directly affect me or my vaccinated children. The authors brought up a couple points I hadn’t previously considered:

  • Newborn babies don’t get all their vaccination on day one, so they depend on herd immunity (i.e. everyone else being vaccinated) to stay healthy. My baby will depend on everyone else being vaccinated.
  • The lifesaving effects of vaccines are astounding, but most vaccines are not 100% effective. There are mutated versions of all those scary diseases that we can still catch. If another child gets sick with a mutated viruses (which is more likely with zero vaccination protection), my child may be at risk, even with a vaccination.
  • If a high enough percentage of the population is unvaccinated, viruses are likely to mutate within their multitude of hosts, making vaccines less effective in those that do get their shots. All children (without medical contraindications) must get vaccinated for my child’s vaccination to be as effective as it should be.

It turns out we are in this together. Part of me wishes I hadn’t read this because it made me more judgmental of others’ decisions and more likely to ask the somewhat offensive question, “Is your child vaccinated?” before scheduling a playdate. Another part of me is grateful to be informed and hopes I’ll actually have the guts to pose that question.

Misconception #11: Kids shouldn’t drink from garden hoses because they contain bacteria. When we moved into our new home, I pondered over the various garden hose options at Lowe’s and forewent spending extra money on the safe-for-drinking hose. Now I wish I had splurged. The problem with garden hoses is not the bacteria, it’s that they contain lead. Yes, lead as in the neurotoxic heavy metal, ugh! Baby 411 recommends running to the hose for a minute to clear lead before filling a kiddie pool (from which children will inevitably drink).

Misconception #12: It’s harmless to share utensils with a baby. I would not have thought twice about this before reading Baby 411. According to the authors, tooth decay is contagious. By swapping saliva with the baby, you also share cavity-causing bacteria that can erode the baby’s new teeth. Who knew?

Misconception #13: TV is never good for kids. I’ve never had the intention of completely preventing my children from watching TV, but that doesn’t mean I thought TV was beneficial—I assumed that I’d need an occasional break from providing entertainment. For the most part, Baby 411 advocates against screen time. Young babies aren’t developmentally capable of understanding what’s on the screen, and that time in front of the TV takes away from time that could spent listening to parents talk or read, or playing with toys they do understand. However, there is evidence that educational programming is beneficial for kids, provided they can understand the content. The authors say “the magic age to understand TV is two years old.” This rules out “Baby Genius.” However, even after two years, the authors recommend limiting screen time (check out the book for more details).

Other interesting factoids from Baby 411:

  • The average baby goes through 2300 diaper changes in the first year alone. Oh my god.
  • Babies lose their hair around four months, and then grow new hair. Good to know ahead of time, that would have freaked me out.
  • The authors say you can expect an infection every other week in the winter. You can also expect to catch many of the infections your child gets. Ick.
  • There are studies that have found “babies conceived less than 12 months after the birth of the first-born child were three times more likely to be diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder. Babies conceived from 12 to 23 months after the birth of the first-born child had almost two times the risk of autism. And, even babies conceived 23-35 months after the firstborn child had a slightly greater risk of autism.” I had never heard this before. I had a sister close to my age, which I loved, but I will definitely balance that priority with this evidence when planning my next pregnancy.

After reading Baby 411 I feel like I know a little more about babies, but friends and family tell me that what sounds good, effective, and easy on paper in baby books often isn’t any of those things in real life. I’m sure after the baby is born I’ll be able to write a much longer “Misconceptions I Had About Babies” blog post than this (maybe even containing opinions that contradict what I wrote here) based on experience.

12 Weeks Pregnant: Head Cold with a Side of Morning Sickness

Posted on by

September 7 – September 13: 12 Weeks 0 Days – 12 Weeks 6 Days.

This week was hard. A multitude of women and pregnancy resources told me that I’d miraculously start feeling better in the second trimester, so I’d been impatiently awaiting week twelve. At eleven weeks and five days I puked for the first time, and the next day I puked again. I was still hoping for a miracle at the twelve week mark.

Early Monday afternoon, twelve weeks and zero days, I slumped defeated at my kitchen table with my head in my hands. I was nauseated as ever and ready to burst into tears. Granted, things have improved. I’m not as fatigued—I can now walk uphill without getting completely out of breath—and the nausea isn’t as debilitating. However, the nausea is definitely still there and it’s unforgiving in the afternoon.

I’ve discovered there are different types of nausea. Earlier in pregnancy my stomach had a dull ache and I felt queasy. Various smells and situations made me feel worse, but only a couple times did I think I would actually throw up. More recently, the constant queasiness is less poignant, but if I encounter an offensive smell, it triggers me to retch. And by offensive I mean, the smell of our new mattress, or the kitchenware aisle in the grocery store (or any aisle in a drug store—gag), or Foxy’s dog treats. There’s a pretty low bar for offensive.

I have an optimistic personality, and after I’ve taken some time to wallow, I instinctively seek out joys, goodies, and pick-me-ups that will get me out of a funk. When I used to run competitively I was motivated to persevere by inspirational songs with a harder edge like, “Lose Yourself” by Eminem or “Remember the Name” by Fort Minor. Too emotionally fragile to absorb anything that harsh, this week I reverted to the last time I was going through a highly hormonal period: teenagehood. As I ate lunch, I YouTube’d sickeningly uplifting nineties songs, such as “Hero” by Mariah Carey, “That’s the Way it Is” by Celine Dion, and “When You Believe” by Whitney Houston and Mariah. When I was a teen I used to play guitar and sing to blow off steam, but I haven’t been motivated to do so while pregnant because it feels like it’s only a matter of time before I wont be able to reach the guitar strings over my growing belly (Update: I had several months before I was too big to play guitar). Instead, I found sheet music for “Hero” and started to learn that on piano.

Later on Monday I had a sore throat, which I was sure was from vomiting the previous day (And maybe exacerbated by singing and playing “My Heart Will Go On” on piano—a performance that sent Foxy hiding under the desk in the far corner of the room). Tuesday, the sore throat got worse, and by Wednesday I had to admit to myself that I had a cold. I took the rest of the week off work, and, despite my resolve not to lose the money I’d prepaid for my Thursday night prenatal Pilates class, my husband shamed me into skipping it: “All the other women there are pregnant too, do you think they want to get sick like you?”

Normally I try to avoid taking medication, but I’ll often make an exception and use a decongestant at night when I have a cold so I can get some healing sleep. However, decongestants are strictly off limits during pregnancy so I had to tough it out. I sniffled my way through a box of tissues, dreading every cough and sneeze for fear it would spur me to puke.

As soon as I knew I was sick, I reached out to friends on Facebook for natural cold remedies. I spent a couple days pretty miserable, but thanks to some friends’ helpful suggestions, I got better in record time! Here’s some of the advice they gave me, as well as some of my own thoughts:

  • Rest. I bought “Mean Streak” by Sandra Brown, which was the perfect combination of suspense, engaging writing, and smut to contentedly park myself on the couch for a day or two.
  • Lemon, Ginger, and Honey in hot water. This also helped me with the nausea, so I drank it nonstop until my teeth began ache from the acidity.
  • Vitamin C and Zinc. I’m sure my prenatal vitamins helped me get better quickly! With those horse pills I’m not lacking for anything right now.
  • Neti. Normally I’m all about the neti, but with the nausea, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Under normal circumstances, my rule of thumb with neti is to do it like crazy the moment I feel a cold coming on—at the hint of a sore throat. In my experience, if I wait until my nose is stuffy, the neti can actually make things worse because the water gets trapped up in the sinuses.
  • Gargle with salt or tea tree oil. I wasn’t reminded of this advice until I was nearly better. My mom has sworn by the salt gargling thing for years, and although it’s one of my least favorite things to do, I do think it helps.
  • Steaming. I took warm showers in lieu of steaming. On Pinterst, I saw a suggestion to hang eucalyptus branches in the shower to add a refreshing, relaxing scent to the steam. Don’t do this. It smells awful! Add soggy eucalyptus branches to the list of scents that make me retch.
Eucalyptus in the shower

Not recommended.

Even if I didn’t spontaneously start feeling like a pregnancy goddess at week twelve, my week ended with a little bit of magic. By Sunday I was feeling healthy enough to go for a walk on the beach with Richard and Foxy, and there was a whole pod of dolphins fishing and playing just off shore.

12 Weeks Pregnant

Twelve (almost thirteen) weeks pregnant at the beach.

27 Weeks Pregnant: Home for Christmas

Posted on by

December 22 – December 28: 27 Weeks 0 Days – 27 Weeks 6 Days.

Long story short: Traveling while pregnant was not nearly as big a deal as I thought it would be, and it was totally worth seeing my family and friends for Christmas.

I started researching traveling while pregnant months ago, because I was sure it wouldn’t be wise for me to head fly home for Christmas when I was 27 weeks pregnant. I was worried that my baby would be deformed by in-flight radiation exposure, or that something about the pressure changes and sitting in a cramped seat would cause me to throw a clot, or that the airline wouldn’t even let me on the plane. Turns out all my fears were unfounded, especially for a short two-hour flight from San Francisco to Vancouver.

In-flight radiation: There was consensus among all the sources I read was that I would not exposed to enough in-flight radiation to affect the fetus unless I flew frequently (like a flight attendant or pilot). One round-trip for the whole duration of my pregnancy was negligible.

Blood clots: I didn’t find anything to indicate the pressure changes during a flight contribute to  blood clots, but sitting still for long periods can (particularly since I’ve had a couple varicose veins crop up). I’m sure I sit for longer than two hours in front of my computer or reading a book sometimes, so a two-hour flight probably wasn’t a big deal. Still, I got up a couple times to walk around and stretch. On the flight back to SFO I had the aisle seat, which was nice because I could move around whenever I wanted. If the flight was longer, I may have worn compression stockings to promote even better circulation.

Airline regulations: I read that some airlines wont let pregnant women fly after 28 weeks, which made me nervous about getting up to Canada and then not being allowed to board the plan back home. It turns out most airlines don’t restrict travel until 36 weeks, which was the case with the airline we flew. Still, I got a note from my midwife noting how far along I was and that I had her blessing to travel. No one at the airline asked to see the letter or even seemed to think twice about letting me on the flights. The only time anyone expressed concern was toward the end of the flight back to San Francisco when I was out of my seat frequently, stretching and sighing. Sleeping in an unfamiliar bed and neglecting my normal exercise routine for a week had left me feeling a little kinked, and sitting in a cramped airplane seat didn’t help. The flight attendant came by to check that I was okay, but she may have done that with anyone.

Backscatter X-ray: At San Francisco International Airport, they indiscriminately route everyone through the backscatter x-ray machine. They say that you get much more radiation exposure in flight than in those machines, so I normally get my “virtual strip search” without thinking twice. However, with the perspective that having a sensitive fetus in my belly gave me, I decided that getting in-flight radiation alone would be better getting than in-flight radiation plus backscatter radiation (even if the difference was marginal). Richard has never trusted those machines, so I’ve watched him go through the process of requesting and receiving a pat-down many times, and knew it wouldn’t be a big deal. Honestly, I think it was more awkward for the woman administering the pat-down than it was for me. She asked me if I had any medical conditions, to which I responded, “no.” In retrospect, that was probably her way of politely asking if I was pregnant. I guess all my affirmations about pregnancy being a natural, normal, healthy, safe process have set in.

Any small inconveniences of traveling while pregnant were forgotten in the joy of spending the holidays with family and old friends. Before Christmas, I had a wonderful baby shower with old friends. No one will celebrate big life events with you quite as earnestly as the people who have seen you grow up. I was touched that so many people showed up to share in the baby love with me. I brought home a closet full of adorable baby clothes, cozy blankets, and story books, along with an amazing hand-crocheted mobile from my sister.

Forest Mobile

Hand-crafted mobile made by my sister.

I loved spending time with my two-year-old niece, whom I don’t see nearly enough. She is so full of wonder and energy! Although, it did make me wonder how I will handle being pregnant with a toddler in tow next time ’round. Obviously I’ll figure it out, but I think it will be a much less me-focused experience of pregnancy.

Gingerbread House

My niece and I decorated a gingerbread house together. I wish I could blame the loppy icing on her, but that was all me.

On Christmas Eve, my mom and I joined my sister at her church for the Christmas Eve service, while Richard stayed home to give his dad a call. I felt kind of like the prodigal sister, showing off my big pregnant belly in pumps and a tight leopard-print dress with no husband in sight. All I needed was green eye shadow and a run in my stockings to complete the picture. The baby kicked whenever we sung carols. She seems to respond to sound more now. The other night, Richard read The Hungry Caterpillar to my belly (which we got from the baby shower). When he made a loud popping sound effect to signify the caterpillar breaking out of its cocoon, the baby kicked hard!

The Prodigal Sister

Bump update on Christmas Eve.

There’s nothing like spending Christmas at home with my family. As usual, I fell victim to my mom’s delicious spread of sweet and savory treats, and probably gained more weight than I needed to over the trip, but what’s life without having whole milk and shortbread cookies for breakfast every now and then? My mom’s a craigslist aficionado, and (on top of the new clothes she got me for my shower) she sent me home with some cute second-hand baby clothes. Where safety issues aren’t a concern, I’m all about used baby stuff—it seems crazy to spend a fortune on a wardrobe that only fits for 3 months (that said: in spite of myself, I have several irresistible hand-made onesies from Etsy on my registry). For Christmas, my dad got goodies from my baby registry, including one of my most-researched items: the ErgoBaby Carrier. Of course, the cliché is true: the greatest gift of all was spending joyful quality time in front of the Christmas tree, around the dinner table, and out-and-about with everyone I care about.

Belly Heart

Quintessential pregnancy shot with my love on Christmas Day.

26 Weeks Pregnant: Baby Movements

Posted on by

December 15 – December 21: 26 Weeks 0 Days – 26 Weeks 6 Days.

I first felt the baby kick when I was eighteen weeks pregnant: there was a single little jab below by belly button, then I didn’t feel her again for a week or two. Gradually I started to feel her more and more frequently. The baby is kicking, shifting, and stretching all the time now. She seems to move most when I’m eating or lying down, so I assume she falls asleep when I’m moving around (probably a good trick to remember for when she’s out of the belly).

The baby changes positions frequently. It feels as though some days she’s set up to make firm contact with my abdominal wall and other days she’s positioned to kick the placenta (which is in the front)—my sensation of her movements can be unmistakeably strong or barely perceptible. When the baby kicks outward, it’s sweet and amazing, but she occasionally kicks downward to make contact with my pelvic floor (and bladder), which is shocking, or upward to hit my stomach, which I think contributes to heartburn.

A week or two ago, Baby Center told me it was important that I start tracking the baby’s movements, and if I didn’t feel the baby moving for a certain period of time to seek medical attention. I have a mixed relationship with BabyCenter. I love receiving updates on the baby and when I Google a pregnancy-related topic BabyCenter nearly always has a relevant, informative article. However, the tips and articles they send me are perpetually stressing me out. Sure enough, shortly after reading the article about tracking kicks I went a whole day feeling only sensations that were maybe the baby moving, maybe not. It was also a busy day, so I may have simply not been paying attention.

Richard and I went to bed late that night, and I told him I hadn’t felt the baby move, and that BabyCenter said I should be worried. Neither of us could sleep, so I spent the next hour changing positions to try to wake the baby up and get some movement out of her. Finally I got some kicks out of her, and Richard and I were both able to exhale and get some rest. The next day she was jump, jive, and wailing all day long so she must’ve taken a day of rest to regain her energy.

The next time I saw my midwife, I asked her about tracking the baby’s movements, and she said different people had different opinions, but she didn’t ask people to constantly track their unborn baby’s movements unless there was already a reason to worry. She hit the bitten-down fingernail on the head, saying constantly tracking could just be another source of stress. If I hadn’t felt the baby kick in a while, she continued, I could drink an ice cold glass of juice then lay down—that nearly always got a baby moving. She reassured me that if I was really worried I could always come in and they could check on the baby.

She was right about the cold sugar-water waking up babies. I got my gestational diabetes test done this week, wherein I had to fast for twelve hours, drink ten sickly ounces of melted popsicles within 5 minutes, and then sit around for two hours to see how my body processed the sugar (I was happy and relieved when I got my negative test results a couple days later). Although my affinity for sugar has sharply decreased during pregnancy, I still consider myself to be somewhat of a sugar addict, and I thought I would have no problems quaffing the tutti-frutti syrup. The first three minutes were okay, but those last two were torture. For the next hour I had to get up and walk around frequently to keep it down. The baby loved it though! She was kicking strongly and constantly.

The big milestone this week was that I could see the baby moving. Before I was pregnant, I didn’t realize this was a thing! I was taking a shallow not-too-hot bath, when I felt a kick and saw my belly twitch. Then again. And again. I was mesmerized and in awe. It was also a little creepy, but I got over that. After I got out of the bath, I marveled with Richard a little longer as she continued to show us her kicks. I haven’t seen this again in the days since, so I think she was positioned perfectly that night to make an impact. This weekend, I had a wonderful baby shower with my family and my high school and university friends. My sister and friend were telling me toward the end of the third trimester, you can very clearly see the rolling and shifting of the baby. I’m looking forward to that amazing and weird experience!

26 Week Bump

Bump update from my Canadian baby shower at 26 weeks.